Wikitruth thanks you for your years of support!
Frequently Whined Questions
From Wikitruth
Here are the questions we think we would hear from you if, in fact, we listened.
Contents |
[edit] Wikipedia is actually really cool, you Fucks
Also known as: Go pick on the real sucky sites, I'll bet you were banned for being a vandal or cockroach, Wikipedia is good enough for anyone normal to use it
Make no mistake, we wouldn't be bitching this much about Wikipedia and Wikipedian failings if we didn't, at the core, love the whole concept. In fact, not only do we think it's cool, we spend tons of time on there. Like, hundreds of hours between all of us. We really do think the basic idea is great; it's the implementation we have issues with. Too many rules are left to be decided by consensus. Too much interpretation (like a song or a poem, not a law) takes place when people whip out their policy schlongs at each other. And, sadly, censorship is now blowing across the Wikipedia landscape, taking good work and sending good people into the night.
In fact, that's the problem! There are so many people who have been burnt out on Wikipedia because of the bullshit, the little God-Kings, the complete lack of direction from the top. The project has literally lost hundreds of good, solid, intelligent people, leaving a core of folks either completely masochistic in nature, or in possesion of little tiny reptile brains. And after all that good work and design on the code and the initial basic ideas!
It's like someone created a great sports car and then made it so that it had 408 steering wheels and a random button that says "skid uncontrollably". We're here to shake that thing up, give people a new perspective.
So yeah! We're in total agreement, you bastards!
[edit] Put up or shut up
Also known as: Come Join Us in Our Cult of Light, if you think there's something so wrong with something in Wikipedia just join the community, now now there, give us a hug
Hey, like we said above, we are in fact actively editing Wikipedia. But there are some inherent flaws in the system, which no amount of editing will fix. By "taking it out of town", as they say, we can sit from a higher vantage point and poke some fun at the issues in the system, without somebody deciding to prove a point by editing up our little essays for grammar, spelling, and what have you. Otherwise, it's like trying to explain to somebody why they're in such bad shape in their environment, and they appear to be listening to you, and then they lean in at the end... and pick a piece of dust off your shirt. We'll keep our little house in order, and we'll point out the concerns we have in Jimbo's Shit-Spraying Exploding House of Doom from it.
[edit] How do I put my own personal nutsack on the face of your Wiki?
Also known as: I want to edit here too, If you added my ideas to yours you wouldn't suck so bad, it's censorship for you not to open your wiki to every being or bot with an IP address, you are elitist knobs afraid of a little alternate viewpoint
Sorry, we're not open to editing. If you want a place where chaos reigns supreme, where it's a constant battle to be heard over the din, and where any particularly zesty or interesting points of view are swaddled in endless moronic cheesecloth, there's another Wiki we can suggest you hang out in.
But if you want to reach the editors of this site, please use your Wikipedia account and call out to us with your magic incantation and we'll take your words under advisement, or maybe into the shredder, or perhaps the special place we put the folks who contact us and tell us we're violating Wikipedia policy, unaware that we're kind of not under Mother Jimbo's Apron.
[edit] Who the hell ARE you?
We are many things, but we are not, and never have been, David Gerard. We're also not Lir, Daniel Brandt, Andrew Orlowski, Kelly Martin, Jeff "Hemos" Bates, Larry Sanger, or (and someone accused us of this) Jimbo Wales. We may or may not be Ta bu shi dee lemon squeezee, your mum, and Ashida Kim.
We are just a bunch of guys (and gal) with a little sense of humor, a dollop of indignation, and 8 gallons of piss and vinegar. Make no mistake, the hounds are afoot, but really, does it matter who we are? It's what we say that counts.
[edit] Ha Ha you're using MediaWiki software
Also known as: The Irony Board, You are Hypocrites, If You Want Wikipedia to Die Why Are You Using Its Software, This Proves You Are All Goats, etc.
This is a relatively common snort/smirk out of the self-important folks who seem incapable of separating software and implementation. We cover this in the first question, but you'd be surprised how many people aren't reading it, so we made it clearer. We never said the MediaWiki software was bad, poorly done, broken, or otherwise inferior. In fact, let us go on the record: the MediaWiki software fucking rules. There have been some amazing folks developing this software, adding and improving it with features, over the past few years. None of them have been Jimbo. A lot of them have done other work as well that leaves us breathless. They're like the Hall of Justice but with computers and bigger codpieces.
What we're bitching about is the insane policy and implementation of this software in Wikipedia. The arbitrariness of the ruleset, the gaps in logic, the foolish little God-Kings scurrying around like ants, the unnecessary pain and writhing that occurs every single day.
We love the way the Car was designed. We hate the fact they give the keys to dumbasses who drive it into a tree. And then call it success because hell, we didn't need a tree there.
[edit] There are a gajillion articles and you're worried about, like, 8
Also known as: Let me whip out my math skills and show you what a tiny percentage the censored articles are, focus on the positive here's a flower, Wikipedia is a success oh god please say it's a success or else I'm going to cut myself
This is a favorite because it shows how deluded people are when they read this site. While it's nice that so many people want to see the censored article and nothing else (this is like going to Sea World just to see Shamu and fuck those harp seals), we actually have a bunch of other stuff in there. We take issue with policy, we show how the system has different kinds of Vandalism, and we even poke a little fun at the guys in charge. So really, we're a one-stop shop, not a one-horse town.
For every censored article we rescued from the muck, there's a hundred articles that have suffered greatly by people gaming the system to their own ends, and a thousand articles where arbitrary action by God-Kings have driven good, solid writers and contributors away or into submission. So it's not just about the rescued goodies, kids. It's about the whole kit and kaboodle.
And using phrases like "kit and kaboodle", which at this point nobody uses enough any more.
